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Thread: I now believe in God...

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    Atheist's Avatar
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    I now believe in God...

    I suppose that there are several threads where I could have posted this... but none seemed like a proper fit. I fully understand if my thread gets merged.

    Anyway.
    I'm not saying I'm a Christian or anything; I'm very analytical. The Christian thing makes no sense whatsoever... but something has come up, and I think that God is a perfect explanation.

    Hurricane Harvey.

    I mean think about it... let me take you back...

    In 2000 we (I mean Americans, NOT ME) elected George W. Bush to the presidency. He DID NOT win the popular vote. He was horrific. Then in 2004 he was elected AGAIN in spite of the terrible job that he did. This totally pissed God off, but he was patient. He Gave W. a chance. Eight months into his second term it was abundantly clear that the fuckery would continue, so God decided to fuck up an extremely conservative state. Enter Hurricane Katrina which wrecked havoc and devastation across Louisiana. (9 electoral votes).

    2016... we (again I mean Americans, NOT ME) elected FuckFaceVonClownStick to the presidency. He DID NOT win the popular vote. He has been horrific, and nothing has been done to remove him from office in spite of the obvious fact that he is completely incompetent and unqualified for the job. God, being patient, gave FFVCS a chance. Eight months in (coincidence?) Hurricane Harvey hits an extremely conservative state. Texas. (38 electoral votes).

    Many conservatives have blamed these hurricanes on the LGBT community... but I'm pretty sure that the truth lies in politics.

    God Hates Republicans...

    So, if I assume that is true, then I must also assume that God does (in fact) exist.

    Fuck... I hate being wrong.

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    Super Moderator Misrule's Avatar
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    Interesting logic, if a bit selective. You wouldn't accept any other explanations? Like the variablility of weather? How many conservative states are there that are also hurricane prone?
    I reckon you've got it wrong - it's the JAMMs.

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  5. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Misrule View Post
    Interesting logic, if a bit selective. You wouldn't accept any other explanations? Like the variability of weather? How many conservative states are there that are also hurricane prone?
    I reckon you've got it wrong - it's the JAMMs.
    (I assume that everyone knows that I'm being a smart ass...)

    There simply are no other (logical) explanations. This is obvious. If you deny it you are deluded!
    Note that Mississippi also got hit pretty bad in 2005... (conservative as fuck).

    Variability of weather??? Seriously??? Ummm hello? GOD! Weather isn't an issue for the almighty... you're being silly...

    Okay... I don't know what JAMMs are so I can't make a hilarious joke about it...

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    Super Moderator Misrule's Avatar
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    The JAMMs? That was me being a smart ass. Justified Ancients of MuMu. Don't ask - worse than the God explanation.

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