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Thread: A Game Of Folical Monkey's .....

  1. #1
    Fucking With The Fuckwits Jaguar7777's Avatar
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    A Game Of Folical Monkey's .....

    I keep my hair very short now, so thought it would be a good idea to invest in a decent hair trimmer. I have also noticed that my nasal hair grows much faster and to my horror hair is now growing out of my ears. Damn, even my eyebrows are getting out of hand! So, I go online to do a little research, thinking this would be a very straightforward journey. Oh yeah? I think not.

    All the reviews were ........ "Will it cut my pubic hair?" They've got to be joking, right? Apparently not. What sort of fucking world am I living in when Men feel the need to shave their pubic hair? Jeeze ... I don't really like women doing it, after all, nature put it there so why fuck with it? So, the only way I could get a decent review was to use You Tube, and even that was not without it's dangers. Anyway, to cut a long story short I finally found a superb trimmer, one that I couldn't be more happy with.

    Now ... back to the nose, ears and eyebrows. My Dad has a nasal clipper, and I've seen him using it. It looks like the Spanish inquisition, what with him wincing and hopping from one foot to the other. Fuck that. There must be something better. Back to You Tube.

    Just as I was about to give up, because I know discomfort when I see it, even if the Fuckwit is trying to put a brave face on the proceedings, I see a guy come out of a huge hypermarket in the states carrying a personal trimmer I had never seen before. He's selfie filming, trotting out of the store and into his car. There, using the rear view mirror he tries out his new personal trimmer. Within a couple of minutes all nasal hair has gone, the ears are done and his eyebrows look neat and tidy. Most impressive was the way he stuck this thing up his nose, moving it around all over the place and confessing with a huge smile that he didn't feel a thing.

    So ..... I ordered one.

    It arrived discreetly packaged as promised, whatever that means. Just looked like an ordinary parcel to me. The thing itself was very different to anything I had seen. Guaranteed not to pull and totally painless and fuss free in use. Fully washable. Sounds good, but I can still see my Dad hopping around. So ... am I prepared to stick this up my nose? Yes and no. No seems to get the common sense vote, but due to the fact I'm worried I might eventually start whipping myself with my own nose hair the Yes vote seems to be the majority decision.

    Hair goes ..............................

    Well I'll be damned. It works. No pain, nothing nasty in the woodshed, and the result is way better than I could have expected. I look into the mirror to see a new me smiling back at me. I look ten years younger and twice as handsome as I know I'm not. To the guy in the car? Thank you buddy, your foolish looking review worked wonders for me. I might have to look up all your reviews .... or ... maybe not.

    Jag. (As shiny as a new pin ....... )
    Last edited by Jaguar7777; 07-06-2015 at 03:26 AM. Reason: Hair trigger fingers ...............
    You Know Absolutely Nothing, So Kindly Keep It To Yourself.


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  3. #2
    ಠ_ಠ defrabbit's Avatar
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    so, if one were to read between the lines... what you're saying
    is that you're now sporting a lightning bolt, shaved somewhere
    upon your person, below the waistline. Got it.


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    Super Moderator Misrule's Avatar
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    We want the pics! Particularly the ones of you sticking this thing up your nose and turning it on the first time. Not a wince - yeah, right.

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  7. #4
    jumping on eggshells sp88's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by defrabbit View Post
    you're now sporting a lightning bolt, shaved somewhere
    upon your person, below the waistline.

    Quote Originally Posted by Misrule View Post
    We want the pics!

    in this context, "we" is such a subjective term

    "i know enough to know what's instantly forgettable"

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  9. #5
    Fucking With The Fuckwits Jaguar7777's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sp88 View Post
    in this context, "we" is such a subjective term

    Don't worry, sp88, in this case their imagination far outweighs their powers of deduction.

    Jag. (Hirsute but pruned nicely ..... )
    You Know Absolutely Nothing, So Kindly Keep It To Yourself.


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    Die Another Day BondJmsBond's Avatar
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    I've had a nose/ear hair trimmer for years it works great. I remember when I got it an ex-friend laughed at me.
    Now I'm svelte and he has ear hair growing out the last time I saw him. eew

    A girl friend asked me to mow down there so I got an electric trimmer too. I trim not bald, experiment with different shapes mostly landing strip, arrow pointing down is cool too.
    Girls seem to appreciate it, some giggle.
    Last edited by BondJmsBond; 07-06-2015 at 06:14 PM.

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  13. #7
    Artificially Sweetened Toxic_Cherub's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BondJmsBond View Post
    I trim not bald, experiment with different shapes mostly landing strip.
    Girls seem to appreciate it, some giggle.
    I think we may need to re-name this thread now. Something like "Tales from below the dark side"?
    I'm getting all these images just bombarding my mind. I'm wondering if you do it to the theme of "Goldfinger"?

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  15. #8
    Divas wildwest08's Avatar
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    Cool





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  17. #9
    Die Another Day BondJmsBond's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Toxic_Cherub View Post
    I'm wondering if you do it to the theme of "Goldfinger"?
    "Hairfall"

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  19. #10
    ಠ_ಠ defrabbit's Avatar
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    On Hair Majesty's Secret Service

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